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A Quarterly Journal
Jeffrey Woodward, Founder & Owner
Ray Rasmussen, General Editor

Volume 12, Number 2, June 2018

Alexis Rotella
Arnold, Maryland, USA

No Thanks

I meet him at the Hay Loft, the guy with a baby face. He tells me he’s a southern-born Christian, though I don’t know what that really means. I, too, was raised Christian—so what else is new? He asks me to go with him tomorrow to Monticello, home of Thomas Jefferson.

On our drive home he parks at the edge of a cliff, tells me as a young man he sold soap from door to door, like I should give him a medal.

Now he’s trying to sell me Jesus. He takes out his Bible, opens it to a verse from John, asks me to repent my sins, which I don’t.

Sponge bath
my third one



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